Once upon a time, I was a published poet. It predates my newspaper years. I have taken a very long break from it, and there was something brewing in my thoughts...this is how it came together. It may need some work, but at least I got it written.
There will be no kiss at midnight
as the clock strikes at twelve.
Nothing can match the joys
that this year I have felt.
There will be no kiss at midnight
as this year comes to an end.
I say goodbye, adieu, farewell
as wishes for the year ahead, I send.
There will be no kiss at midnight
and with that I am okay.
Tomorrow brings a new year
and I celebrate that, and a brand new day.
There will be no kiss at midnight
yet life remains amazing and true.
I dream big dreams and have high hopes
for me and also for you.
Wednesday, December 31, 2014
Be. Live. Believe. Goodbye 2014, Hello 2015!
This was an interesting year. I know many people are happy to see 2014 left in the dust, and many with good reason. There are things that turned out differently than I had hoped, differently than I would have liked. There are things that I out-right hated and there were things that caused me great struggle. And then...there were the amazing things.
An example of things going differently than I had planned:
I was excitedly planning my trip to visit my granddad in October. As I posted, as it turned out, he knew that I wouldn't be making that trip to see him. I still made the trip, but it was for different reasons. I still ache from this loss, but I celebrate the fact that I had so many extra years with him. My granddad was a blessing in my life and the fact that my kids got to know at least one great grandparent is far more than I ever had. I miss him every day. I wonder how to work through things where I know he would have great advice. But, I give thanks for the time we had and I remember him fondly. It just went differently than I had planned. And, that's ok. It has to be ok.
I spent less time writing than I would have liked and that is something that will change in the year to come. I will seek out more things to review. I will review more experiences that I know I can write about and I will post more on both blogs. But I will also set aside time for writing and working on my book projects. I am committed to seeing them through and it will happen. I will make it happen. I shifted my focus in 2014 to expanding my tech background for teaching. This path started in December 2013 when my then-principal sent me to a workshop that opened doors for me and got me thinking differently. It actually all got me back on track, in fact. In 2002, I considered eventually getting my Master's in Education Technology. In 2014, I became Google Educator Qualified and I am watching for a Google Teacher Academy that works for me so I can become Google Certified. In the meantime, I have started my BTSA program (necessary for my teaching) and once completed, I will find the EdTech program that works best for me. Meanwhile, I am attending conferences, going on adventures, and exploring ways of expanding myself as a teacher...as an educator. It's fantastic. Having two very time consuming career goals means I have to work a little harder at time management. Having two young children means that I need to be especially diligent in my time management. I am thankful for the opportunities I have had and continue to find that make things possible. I am thankful for the loving and supportive people in my life who help me as I aspire to reach these goals.
This is the first time that I have decided to skip my list of items for the year ahead and keep it all simple. In 2015, I will: Be. Live. Believe.
I will BE who I am.
I will LIVE life fully.
I will BELIEVE I can do the things I desire.
Anyone who wants to join me on this journey is welcome to be a part of it. I hope to make new friends along the way. I also hope to maintain the strongest of friendships I have, near and far. I hope to meet new people. I hope to do new things.
Come along with me....
it's an adventure.
It's life. If you want to be a part of mine, the door is open. The journey is ours. I will happily share in your journey as you share in mine.
Goodbye 2014. Hello 2015! Bring it on! It's going to be great! There will be struggles. There will be tears. But, all of the good is so worth the ride.
Be.
Live.
Believe.
2015.
An example of things going differently than I had planned:
I was excitedly planning my trip to visit my granddad in October. As I posted, as it turned out, he knew that I wouldn't be making that trip to see him. I still made the trip, but it was for different reasons. I still ache from this loss, but I celebrate the fact that I had so many extra years with him. My granddad was a blessing in my life and the fact that my kids got to know at least one great grandparent is far more than I ever had. I miss him every day. I wonder how to work through things where I know he would have great advice. But, I give thanks for the time we had and I remember him fondly. It just went differently than I had planned. And, that's ok. It has to be ok.
I spent less time writing than I would have liked and that is something that will change in the year to come. I will seek out more things to review. I will review more experiences that I know I can write about and I will post more on both blogs. But I will also set aside time for writing and working on my book projects. I am committed to seeing them through and it will happen. I will make it happen. I shifted my focus in 2014 to expanding my tech background for teaching. This path started in December 2013 when my then-principal sent me to a workshop that opened doors for me and got me thinking differently. It actually all got me back on track, in fact. In 2002, I considered eventually getting my Master's in Education Technology. In 2014, I became Google Educator Qualified and I am watching for a Google Teacher Academy that works for me so I can become Google Certified. In the meantime, I have started my BTSA program (necessary for my teaching) and once completed, I will find the EdTech program that works best for me. Meanwhile, I am attending conferences, going on adventures, and exploring ways of expanding myself as a teacher...as an educator. It's fantastic. Having two very time consuming career goals means I have to work a little harder at time management. Having two young children means that I need to be especially diligent in my time management. I am thankful for the opportunities I have had and continue to find that make things possible. I am thankful for the loving and supportive people in my life who help me as I aspire to reach these goals.
This is the first time that I have decided to skip my list of items for the year ahead and keep it all simple. In 2015, I will: Be. Live. Believe.
I will BE who I am.
I will LIVE life fully.
I will BELIEVE I can do the things I desire.
Anyone who wants to join me on this journey is welcome to be a part of it. I hope to make new friends along the way. I also hope to maintain the strongest of friendships I have, near and far. I hope to meet new people. I hope to do new things.
Come along with me....
it's an adventure.
It's life. If you want to be a part of mine, the door is open. The journey is ours. I will happily share in your journey as you share in mine.
Goodbye 2014. Hello 2015! Bring it on! It's going to be great! There will be struggles. There will be tears. But, all of the good is so worth the ride.
Be.
Live.
Believe.
2015.
Monday, December 29, 2014
A new chapter begins
Since my last post, our family has been in a period of transition.
I traveled to SoCal and spent time sitting in my granddad's den, looking through pictures, reading things he had written, going through books, and thinking. I spent a lot of time thinking. And crying.
Then, I went numb. I felt very little emotion. I immersed myself in work and spent free time preparing things for the memorial. My tears had completely subsided.
Just a couple of days before we left to travel for the memorial, we learned that my dad was losing his driving privileges. We knew the time was coming. We had already started making adjustments. We already knew that I would do the driving for our upcoming trip, but now it was a necessity. Now, it was a reality that we were facing together. Into the future, we headed... full on.
The memorial brought together family near and far. For some, it had been over 20 years since I last saw them. We shared stories. We remembered granddad. We honored granddad. We again took another step into the future.
As Christmas neared, preparation was in full effect. We had much to do and little time to do it. I spent my weekends taking my parents places they needed to go. We had little time for baking. CD and Miss Hollywood each had recital weekends. We had busy schedules and one driver. One day, I had to enlist help from others because of my work schedule. It took five people to cover everything because of my having to work late. But, they did it. They found ways to make things work. WE found ways to make it all work.
We have fully entered and started "writing" the next chapter. We enter a world without granddad. We all miss him terribly and we are all navigating through things in our own ways. The important thing is that we do it together however and whenever possible. Granddad would want that. As I sit here writing this, it still seems surreal that he's not sitting across the room from me. At the same time, we are fully engaged in a time when I need to remember to ask for help when I need it. It has always been difficult for me to do and sometimes I fear leaning on people too heavily. Setting aside pride and asking for help is a must. More importantly, I must set all fear aside. I must step confidently into and through this chapter in life. With my parents and my children heavily reliant on me, I find myself adjusting priorities some. Social things take a backseat to a great degree. Though, I do still try to find time for myself. I am thankful for the friends who are accommodating and helpful in this. My Chico has been incredibly important to me and valued deeply. I hope I am able to let her know. My conversations with S have been fewer and farther between, but we do what we can and pick up where we leave off and we help each other through the good, the bad, and the ugly...everything life has to offer. An awesome experience I am looking forward to is attending a conference with her in March! In fact, it overlaps my birthday, so I'm sure we'll make it something even more special.
I see great things ahead. And this week, someone shared with me an article that helped me keep my head screwed on straight through it.
A first point I especially liked was "you are inherently sexy." I like that. I like the point behind it. But, I would take it to another level. YOU ARE INHERENTLY BEAUTIFUL. Everyone has beauty in some way. I believe strongly in my beauty. I have bad days. Everyone does. I struggle to see my outer beauty at times, but my inner beauty gets me through. And when I spend time focusing on my inner beauty, I see my outer beauty more. Still, it's good to remember that I'm sexy, too, and that there is someone, somewhere who sees it (or will see it) too. Remembering that perks up the ego a bit. Let's face it, even people who practice regular positive talk have a moment of struggle every now and then. And then, it gets better. Positive self-talk is a must! Accepting those moments of struggle and moving on from them is key to maintaining a positive attitude. If you stumble, pick yourself up and move on. That is what I am doing this month. picking myself up and moving forward into this new chapter.
The other two points that stood out to me in that HuffPost article can really be summed up in one of my favorite quotes.attributed to Julian of Norwich:
"And all will be well."
As this new chapter begins: there are some unknowns, there are some concerns, there will be tears, there will be frustration...and there will be joy, laughter, smiles, love, hugs, dancing, running, writing, and greatness. Greatness is ahead. So, let's roll....all will be well.
Stay tuned for my annual new year post, too.
Merry Christmas. Peace and love be yours today and always.
I traveled to SoCal and spent time sitting in my granddad's den, looking through pictures, reading things he had written, going through books, and thinking. I spent a lot of time thinking. And crying.
Then, I went numb. I felt very little emotion. I immersed myself in work and spent free time preparing things for the memorial. My tears had completely subsided.
Just a couple of days before we left to travel for the memorial, we learned that my dad was losing his driving privileges. We knew the time was coming. We had already started making adjustments. We already knew that I would do the driving for our upcoming trip, but now it was a necessity. Now, it was a reality that we were facing together. Into the future, we headed... full on.
The memorial brought together family near and far. For some, it had been over 20 years since I last saw them. We shared stories. We remembered granddad. We honored granddad. We again took another step into the future.
As Christmas neared, preparation was in full effect. We had much to do and little time to do it. I spent my weekends taking my parents places they needed to go. We had little time for baking. CD and Miss Hollywood each had recital weekends. We had busy schedules and one driver. One day, I had to enlist help from others because of my work schedule. It took five people to cover everything because of my having to work late. But, they did it. They found ways to make things work. WE found ways to make it all work.
We have fully entered and started "writing" the next chapter. We enter a world without granddad. We all miss him terribly and we are all navigating through things in our own ways. The important thing is that we do it together however and whenever possible. Granddad would want that. As I sit here writing this, it still seems surreal that he's not sitting across the room from me. At the same time, we are fully engaged in a time when I need to remember to ask for help when I need it. It has always been difficult for me to do and sometimes I fear leaning on people too heavily. Setting aside pride and asking for help is a must. More importantly, I must set all fear aside. I must step confidently into and through this chapter in life. With my parents and my children heavily reliant on me, I find myself adjusting priorities some. Social things take a backseat to a great degree. Though, I do still try to find time for myself. I am thankful for the friends who are accommodating and helpful in this. My Chico has been incredibly important to me and valued deeply. I hope I am able to let her know. My conversations with S have been fewer and farther between, but we do what we can and pick up where we leave off and we help each other through the good, the bad, and the ugly...everything life has to offer. An awesome experience I am looking forward to is attending a conference with her in March! In fact, it overlaps my birthday, so I'm sure we'll make it something even more special.
I see great things ahead. And this week, someone shared with me an article that helped me keep my head screwed on straight through it.
A first point I especially liked was "you are inherently sexy." I like that. I like the point behind it. But, I would take it to another level. YOU ARE INHERENTLY BEAUTIFUL. Everyone has beauty in some way. I believe strongly in my beauty. I have bad days. Everyone does. I struggle to see my outer beauty at times, but my inner beauty gets me through. And when I spend time focusing on my inner beauty, I see my outer beauty more. Still, it's good to remember that I'm sexy, too, and that there is someone, somewhere who sees it (or will see it) too. Remembering that perks up the ego a bit. Let's face it, even people who practice regular positive talk have a moment of struggle every now and then. And then, it gets better. Positive self-talk is a must! Accepting those moments of struggle and moving on from them is key to maintaining a positive attitude. If you stumble, pick yourself up and move on. That is what I am doing this month. picking myself up and moving forward into this new chapter.
The other two points that stood out to me in that HuffPost article can really be summed up in one of my favorite quotes.attributed to Julian of Norwich:
"And all will be well."
As this new chapter begins: there are some unknowns, there are some concerns, there will be tears, there will be frustration...and there will be joy, laughter, smiles, love, hugs, dancing, running, writing, and greatness. Greatness is ahead. So, let's roll....all will be well.
Stay tuned for my annual new year post, too.
Merry Christmas. Peace and love be yours today and always.
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