On our way: Travel Day

*This is part two in a series on our big adventure to Paris, France.

Travel anxiety is a reality for our little family. I have experienced it for years and I have found that both ids experience it to some degree. Managing this is important. One thing I do is work to keep things reasonable and calm for traveling. We plan ahead, and typically pack in advance. We make lists. I also plan for stops however I can make work for us. For this particular trip, I booked a hotel room with the "Park and Go" option at the Doubletree near the San Francisco airport. This allowed us to travel over the day before our flight, have a relaxing evening and use a shuttle to get to the airport the following morning. (I also booked a room for our return so we did not have to drive directly home late in the evening after 22 hours of travel.)

We spent the week before the trip gathering what we needed and packing. The day we would depart home, I picked up the kids early from school and we returned home to double-check everything and load the car. We then headed off to the hotel near the airport. My Chico and family joined us later that night. We had adjoining rooms and we were able to leave both cars at the hotel. This alleviated airport parking fees.

Saturday morning, we got up and going early so we could dress, gather, and catch the airport shuttle. We also checked in for the flight electronically in advance. All we needed to do was check bags and get through security. With six of us traveling, keeping things streamlined and easy to manage was important. We were traveling with a 1:1 ratio of adult to child which helped as well. CD will turn 13 later this year, so he was an added help at times, but also needed some scooting along at times.


Our first flight took us from San Francisco to Dallas. We grabbed a quick bite to eat in the Dallas airport, right next to our departure gate. We then were right there and ready to go when boarding started for our second flight. This flight took us from Dallas to Charles de Gaulle. This flight proved interesting. The estimated flight time was slightly over nine hours. As it turned out, Storm Ciara helped move us right along and we landed in Paris about an hour early. You may have seen the news around that same time. A British Airways flight from New York to London broke a record because of the same tailwinds. We arrived in Paris shortly after 8 a.m. (Paris time). We got through customs, got our passports stamped, picked up our luggage, and started the long journey across the airport. The three kids were troopers. We had a five-year-old, a nine-year-old, and a 12-year-old. Everyone had bags to carry and suitcases to roll along as we made the trek from our arrival terminal to the CDG Metro station.

It was here that our journey into and through Paris began. We needed to get our day passes for the Metro and we planned to get Navigo cards then purchase a week pass for each. For the Navigo, you need a photo of yourself that is roughly the size of a passport photo. Duplicates of passport photos and copies of passport photos can be cut down to fit. They also have an option available if you need a photo. The Photomaton booth is convenient and relatively easy to use. However, as My Chico suggested, you may not want to take a photo after a very long day of traveling. Still, having the option is convenient. It costs about 5€.

Everyone in the Metro station is friendly and helpful. Many speak excellent English, but you can tell they appreciate at least being greeted in French.

Travel tip: When traveling internationally, try to learn at least a few basic phrases. Having the ability to greet someone in their native language can go a long way. I did audio French lessons with the kids so they would become familiar with the language generally, but also so they could learn basic phrases and numbers. This helped them immensely as we traveled through Paris. Day 1 CD could walk into a boulangerie and order a baguette. By the end of the week, he placed a full order for himself and Miss Hollywood in a sit-down cafe.

Once we had our Metro passes squared away, our trek across Paris to our flat began. Be prepared for stairs. With kids and suitcases, this may feel like a challenge. Let's be real. It is a challenge. But, we did it. As the week went on, we found our navigation of the Metro system became more efficient. Still, every Metro station has stairs. Be ready for lots of stairs everywhere you go.

We arrived at our flat and received a warm greeting from the person who met us to show us around and let us know what we needed to know about staying there. As rest for the kids began, My Chico and I headed out to check out our neighborhood. So many fresh options everywhere we went. We were in Heaven. I wish I could live in a similar neighborhood. I loved having the ability to walk everywhere. And so began a week without driving. A welcome break.

For dinner that evening, we enjoyed a poulet roti (rotisserie chicken) and pommes de terre (potatoes) from a nearby boucherie (butcher). We had settled in and were ready to begin our week living in Paris. Our littlest travel buddy and Miss Hollywood seemed especially ready. They would rise around 2 a.m. the next morning and we would all start our day by about 5 a.m. Thank goodness for Nespresso!

In the next blog: We begin seeing the sights of the City of Lights.

"A dream is a wish your heart makes..."

*This is part one in a series on our big adventure to Paris, France.

At age three, Miss Hollywood dreamed of going to Paris. In an effort to make a dream come true, I transformed our home into a Paris bistro with a view of the Eiffel Tower. I purchased baked goods, baked a Madeline hat birthday cake, and placed a canvas of the Eiffel Tower in the front window. The French flag flew out in front of the house. Miss Hollywood wore a smile all afternoon. It was as if we had entered Doctor Who's TARDIS and transported ourselves. It was a day full of joy.

Still, she continued to hope and dream.

What I learned that day, too, was that rather than pump money into a a party, I wanted to start giving the kids adventures. For what I spent transforming our house into Paris for a day, I could have taken the kids to Disneyland. So, starting the following year, we began big adventures. We have visited National Parks, Disneyland, and even taken surfing lessons. The adventures continue to grow. The kids want to see the world and I will do everything I can to show it to them.

From Aladdin:

"I can show you the world

Shining, shimmering, splendid

Tell me, princess, now when did

You last let your heart decide?

I can open your eyes

Take you wonder by wonder

Over, sideways and under

On a magic carpet ride

A whole new world

A new fantastic point of view

No one to tell us, "No"

Or where to go

Or say we're only dreaming

A whole new world

A dazzling place I never knew..."

When she was four, I made a promise to Miss Hollywood. "I will one day take you to Paris."

When CD turned 10, I gave him the opportunity to choose a trip for our little family of three. He chose to go for a "next-gen" trip to our family's ranch in Santa Maria. We invited My Chico and her family to join us, as well as two cousins. We had a fabulous time! Always the planner, Miss Hollywood immediately started talking more seriously again about traveling to Paris. Now age seven, she still loved Madeline books and cartoons, tea parties, and the idea of visiting the top of the Eiffel Tower. It was time to take this idea seriously. When I asked her directly where she wanted her tenth birthday trip to take us, she responded without hesitation, "France."

So, My Chico and I began our preliminary planning. We knew it would happen in 2020. We also knew that summer travel is not always the easiest to navigate nor the most affordable so we began exploring other options. We set our sights on a February trip. Although Miss Hollywood has a summer birthday, in the interest of budgeting both time and money, it seemed reasonable to do her birthday trip just a little early.

Last Spring, we really got to planning and preparing for this big trip. We had our dates selected and started pricing airfare and lodging options. We settled on going with an AirBNB, acknowledging that traveling as a "framily" of six, it would ultimately be the most affordable option. We booked our flights in July of last year to make our first commitment to this trip. Just booking the flights caused great excitement for all of us. We continued to look at our lodging options and began exploring the best means of getting around the City of Lights, what to see and do in the winter time, and how to stretch our dollar (or Euro, as the case may be) and get more bang for our buck on this trip.

For Christmas, I gave CD and Miss Hollywood new suitcases and backpacks to prepare them for our big travel week. I also gave them water bottles. All of these were Harry Potter themed because we love Harry Potter! My Chico gave us each a set of packing cubes. These would come in very handy. They kept us organized and made packing even easier for the kids. I found them to be especially helpful when it came time to repack for the return home at the end of the trip.

In January, we booked our flat in the 20th Arrondissement, right near the 11th. It turned out to be perfect! We found a place close to a Metro station and surrounded by shops so we could pick up bread, cheese, meats, and other items easily. We also began booking our activities. In all, before traveling, we had priced access to Versailles and Le Louvre, purchased two-day passes for the hop-on/hop-off BigBus that included a cruise on the River Seine, and our tickets to the top of the Eiffel Tower. We were ready to go.

The kids began packing a few days ahead of the trip. I helped them plan what to pack, but left most of their packing to them while I worked on my own. This dream was about to come true.

In the next blog: We arrive in Paris, get settled into our flat, and the adventure begins!

Blog post title inspired by Songwriters: Mack David / Al Hoffman / Jerry Livingston / David Pack "A Dream Is a Wish Your Heart Makes" lyrics © Walt Disney Music Company

Thank you for inspiring little girls across generations to dream.

Saying goodbye (My sweet Elizabeth)

*Note: I started to write this over six months ago. I walked away from it and have not posted a blog since. I am now in a place where I need to write again. I have a series of posts that will look at some travel experiences and tips. But I vowed to myself last year that I would not write here until I finished this post. So, first, I will finish this post. This is one of the most difficult things I have ever written and that is why I went on a writing hiatus. Alas, here I am. Ready to write. Therefore, it is time to finish this. Properly. RR 2/17/2020

I had applied to six colleges/universities: University of Tennessee, University of Nebraska, Indiana University, Plymouth College (NH), Chico State, and my "dream school" the American University of Paris. I had received acceptance letters from the first five and decided I should choose from among them. I chose the University of Tennessee. Then, a

letter arrived. I considered changing my decision. It was, afterall, my dream. Once my mom said that I likely wouldn't be able to travel home for Christmas if I was in Paris (though she supported my decision whatever I chose), it was clear that I would go to Tennessee. Family contact was too important to me. At this point in my senior year, I had returned to my regular high school from the LA County HS for the Arts (purely, 100% my choice in my commitment to family), my dad had taken a job six hours away, my mom had gone on medical retirement, and my grandmother had died. The dream of attending school in Paris was not worth being so far from family. My freshman year at UT was imperfect (at best). And, it was one of the most influential years of my life. I learned much about myself, but it is the relationships built that extended my sense of family. Before sunrise Friday morning, I will board a plane to Atlanta. The young lady on the left will greet me once on the ground at ATL. Then, we travel together to say our last goodbyes (or "see you laters") to the young lady in the middle. I created this for them back in 1996. I found a copy in my trunk in my storage unit today. I will make a copy of it to carry with me Friday. We may not know why things play out the way the do. But, in the end, there is a reason for everything. I believe that with all my heart. These three crazy teenagers grew into adult friends who have loved and supported each other through life's ups and downs. The song lyrics I typed on that note 23 years ago were never more true than they are right now. And while my heart hurts, this friendship is something I would not trade for anything in the world. Not a University in Paris, not for not experiencing this loss, not one thing. I am better because I made that decision 24 years ago to attend UT. 


One day, I found myself sitting on the floor outside of my dorm room. Birgitta and Elizabeth were nearby neighbors. They "swooped in" and scooped me up. They took me under their wings. They became instant friends. We were well into the the school year. They were there. The friendships forged that day are special and unique and wonderful. I dreamed of one day moving to Atlanta. We planned (albeit somewhat jokingly) that we would one day all live on the same street. Birgitta and Elizabeth promised they would always watch over me or "be in the bushes." And then the ugly C-word came into our lives. Several months out, I remain sad, angry, and frustrated. F-Cancer. Within less than a year colon cancer ripped two of my best friends from the world. One I met as an adult. The other, was my sweet Elizabeth. She always told it like it was. Yet listened.

When I went through my divorce several years ago, she called. She tried to talk and walk me through, but she listened to every word I had to say. She was like a big sister.

When she was diagnosed in 2018, I booked a flight for Miss K and me to go to Atlanta. I knew better than to waste time. The day after burying another friend who died of colon cancer, I was being picked up by Elizabeth for a day out and about in Atlanta. Our girls hit it off instantly. 

We once talked of living down the street from each other. We talked of our kids growing up together. To see our girls hit it off so famously made it all come together.

And then. In 2019, things worsened. Just before the end of the school year, she left us. It still seems surreal. And it hurts. So much. Dreams shattered. A friendship gone a different direction than we ever could have imagined. I am sad, sometimes angry. How could the world lose such an amazing soul as this?

But....

but...

Yes, but...in her time here, she was such a blessing. I am better for having known her. The world is better because Elizabeth Clark Owens Estes was a part of it.

Four years ago, I was in Southern Alabama. She and her husband drove with their three girls and a foster baby to come meet me. We walked and talked. We ate together. It wasn't exactly what we hoped in our visit, but it was what we needed. I love her. I miss her. I am thankful for everything she was in my life. I am thankful for that day she stopped and figuratively and literally picked me up off the floor and became my friend. 

I could have gone to the American University in Paris and my life would be entirely different. I am thankful for the course that played out from the moment I selected the University of Tennessee. It as a windy road, but here I am. And whole not without pain and loss, it is an awesome place to be.