Stardate: [-27]03355.00 ~ A day to remember, a love to hold

I started to write this last night (in my head), but my sweet Miss Hollywood grew tired and irritable and I set it aside for the evening. Still, I want to document the first day of 2016.

Miss Hollywood has had her ups and downs the past few weeks. She has a temper that can roar and you'll not necessarily see it coming. We're working on navigating through each day and some days are certainly better than others. She's a spunky, loving, five-year-old. She knows what she wants and I can see in her that which needs to be nurtured and channeled in positive ways so that she will grow into a strong woman. Some days, it requires walking that fine line between supporting her and breaking her spirit. I refuse to break her spirit, but it certainly takes some creativity at times.

This week was an amazing week for her. As we escaped for a few days with family, she had a fabulous time. She hiked, she did science, she played games, she played Star Wars (imaginative play outdoors) with her brother and cousins, she hugged, she loved. She had a moment here and there, but worked through those moments of frustration, distraction, anger and came out with love. Already pleased with the week she had, we entered the first day of a new year. This is a day I hope she will remember because I know I will. It is why I am sitting down to write this. I want her to know how special January 1, 2016 was for me, for us.

Stardate: [-27]03355.00
Miss Hollywood,
You had an amazing day today. You started the new year off beautifully! I hope you will remember this day always. You and I had to get creative in the kitchen today. The day started off a little rough for me as I needed some extra rest. While I rested and watched football, you set out to explore the Chromebook Santa brought for you and CD. You played some of your usual games on ABCYA and tried a new Coding activity (Inside Out). You typed. You want to be a blogger like mama. That warmed my heart. You learned that the blinking line that drove you crazy was the cursor telling you where you left off as you typed. You practiced using the space bar. You checked out other things on the Chromebook and loved declaring that you were exploring.



When we made it into the kitchen a little later, our first task was to make Chex Mix. We had no seasoned salt. What would we do? I looked up alternatives on my phone and we successfully made a batch of Chex Mix. You stirred, you measured, you mixed, you set the timer. You did not want to just sit idly by waiting for the time to pass so you pushed me to find what else we could do. Encouraged, perhaps is a better word. And we took each step together and you worked hard. As the Chex Mix finished, we were starting our Scotcharoos when we discovered we were lacking butterscotch chips. Whatever would we do?

We had taken all of the ingredients to the Ranch and inadvertently left the butterscotch chips there, and we were committed to staying home today. I came up with a plan. We called it our aunt's secret recipe alternative. Sshhh.... It was so much fun! The Scotcharoos tasted a little different than usual, of course, but they turned out just fine. Even if I did mix the peanut butter in too soon. You stirred, mixed, put the Rice Krispies mixture in the pan that you had already buttered. You took great care in each and every step. Everything turned out wonderfully and we were pleased. You had an amazing day today, my dear. You are amazing. You are beautiful. You are smart. You are talented. What a great way to start the new year. Last night as we sat down to eat dinner, I grabbed down the Jar of Awesome Events. You, your brother, and I went through it, taking turns to pull something out of the jar. How many parking stubs were in there? I kept the items in a small plastic baggie (as I do every year). We can look back over the years together sometime. You lived up to your Miss Hollywood name. In playing with me, you were pretend crying and got so immersed in it that you cried for real. I hope to see you back on stage someday. Somewhere in the midst of fatigue as you were winding up rather than winding down for the night, you said something that hurt my heart. You said that I don't love you. My darling daughter, I love you more than words can ever express. I love you beyond "to the moon and back." I will spend every day of my life working to show it to you. You deserve to know love and I will do everything I can to model it for you. You had an outstanding first day of the new year. I look forward to where 2016 will take us and I love that we get to do this adventure together. You, CD, and me. The three of us. We are family. We do great things together. And if ever you have a bad day (and you will, we all do), please know that I love you. I will always love you. I am your mom. You are my daughter. We will live and love together in this big crazy world. Thank you for today. Thank you for everyday. Thank you for being you. Thank you for making me strive to be better and do better and love better.

Love always,
Mom/Mama/Mommy